Did I Deserve to Get Cancer?

As I was brainstorming my next blog topic, I could not shake a lingering question: Do people genuinely deserve to fall ill? It is something that often lurks in the recesses of my mind. Did I somehow merit getting Cancer? I know it might sound ludicrous, but bear with me here. Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you are left wondering, "Why is it me?" or "What did I do to deserve this?" It is that moment when you start questioning whether the universe has it out for you or if some divine force is punishing you for some unknown transgression. Let us be honest for a moment – haven't we all entertained these thoughts at some point? And then I cannot help but wonder, shouldn't someone else be facing this instead of me? I hear you, and you are probably thinking, "Come on, John, nobody deserves this." But let us entertain the thought for a moment. Consider the truly vile individuals in history – the likes of Hitler, Putin, or ruthless dictators responsible for unfathomable atrocities. Shouldn't they be the ones facing such hardships? Why is it me, someone who has never intentionally harmed another? Sure, I might have accidentally cut off an old lady on the freeway or skimped on a tip for my waiter, but does that really compare?

This contemplation does not just revolve around myself; it extends to someone incredibly dear to me – my father. Despite battling Parkinson's disease, he remains one of the most compassionate and thoughtful individuals I have ever known. There is a unique bond in a son's relationship with his father, often overshadowed by interactions with our mothers. We tend to overlook expressing our admiration and gratitude to our dads, failing to acknowledge how profoundly they have shaped us. My dad epitomizes selflessness; he always puts his children's needs above his own. This trait was not something he inherited from his own parents; it was a conscious decision to become a better person, one that deeply influenced both my sister and me. I can see this influence in how my sister cares for her son, and I see it in the way I treat my husband.

Thinking about these ideas has helped me understand spirituality and how a higher power fits into our lives better. As I tried to figure out if people really deserve to get sick, I started to question if there is something bigger at work, like God stepping in. It is normal to wonder if there is a kind of cosmic fairness, where good people get rewarded and bad ones get punished. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized it is not that simple.

My dad's fight with Parkinson's is a powerful example. He has always been kind and caring, yet he is still dealing with this illness. It reminds me that life does not always make sense, no matter how good you are. It has made me realize that spirituality is not about getting rewarded or punished by a higher power. It is more about finding meaning and direction when things are uncertain. As we navigate life's unexpected turns, we are encouraged to explore our spirituality more deeply. It is not only about who gets what—they are about finding meaning and courage when things get tough. Watching my dad stay strong in the face of illness taught me that true spirituality is not about everything working out perfectly; it is about finding calm in the chaos and treating everyone with dignity, regardless of their struggles.